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If you call failures experiments, you can put them in your resume and claim them as achievements.

Mason Cooley
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Excuses change nothing, but make everyone feel better.
Mason Cooley
After my spectacular failures, I could not be satisfied with an ordinary success.
Mason Cooley
Most people regard getting their way as a matter of simple justice.
Mason Cooley
Cynicism is full of naive disappointments.
Mason Cooley
The body has a mind of its own.
Mason Cooley
Three meals plus bedtime make four sure blessings a day.
Mason Cooley
A blocked path also offers guidance.
Mason Cooley
I know that I am what I am. But I am not sure what I am.
Mason Cooley
Mind and body obstruct one another's pleasures.
Mason Cooley
For many, immaturity is an ideal, not a defect.
Mason Cooley
My thought has been shaped by books; my desires by pictures.
Mason Cooley
The laughter of the aphorism is sometimes triumphant, but seldom carefree.
Mason Cooley
Flattery and insults raise the same question: What do you want?
Mason Cooley
Some loves are like a vice that has ceased to give pleasure.
Mason Cooley
Death is frightening, and so is Eternal Life.
Mason Cooley
Without civilization, we would not turn into animals, but vegetables.
Mason Cooley
Money: power at its most liquid.
Mason Cooley
Compassion brings us to a stop, and for a moment we rise above ourselves.
Mason Cooley
Even cats grow lonely and anxious.
Mason Cooley
Never ask a bore a question.
Mason Cooley
Minds will wander even during the Last Judgment.
Mason Cooley
Money is to my social existence what health is to my body.
Mason Cooley
Affection reproaches, but does not denounce.
Mason Cooley
Reality is the name we give to our disappointments.
Mason Cooley
Conscious thought is the tidying up at the end.
Mason Cooley
Love begins with an image; lust with a sensation.
Mason Cooley
I have learned to keep to myself how exceptional I am.
Mason Cooley
In psychoanalysis, only the fee is exactly what it seems to be.
Mason Cooley
It is possible to interpret without observing, but not to observe without interpreting.
Mason Cooley
Who would not give up wit for power and beauty?
Mason Cooley
If modesty disappeared, so would exhibitionism.
Mason Cooley
Procrastination makes easy things hard, hard things harder.
Mason Cooley
The wisdom of age: don't stop walking.
Mason Cooley
The doctrine of the immortality of the soul has more threat than comfort.
Mason Cooley
If success is a habit, it is a hard one to acquire.
Mason Cooley
Rereading, we find a new book.
Mason Cooley
Children use all their wiles to get their way with adults. Adults do the same with children.
Mason Cooley
Irony regards every simple truth as a challenge.
Mason Cooley
My mind is led astray by every faint rustle.
Mason Cooley
Fastidious taste makes enjoyment a struggle.
Mason Cooley
My passions have never jumped out of the fireplace and set fire to the carpet.
Mason Cooley
Stated clearly enough, an idea may cancel itself out.
Mason Cooley
Outside books, we avoid colorful characters.
Mason Cooley
I did not know I was in my prime until afterwards.
Mason Cooley
Fears and lies intensify consciousness.
Mason Cooley
Imagination has rules, but we can only guess what they are.
Mason Cooley
The passion for money is never fickle.
Mason Cooley
Expensive advertising courts us with hints and images. The ordinary kind merely says, Buy.
Mason Cooley