When you are in need of someone’s help, appeal to their selfinterest. Do not put yourself in debt with others and do not expect altruism.

Never outshine your superiors. The people with the most power are often the most afraid to loseit. Instead, show them how useful you are.

Enemies can be more trustworthy than friends. The enemy you forgive will feel like they must prove their loyalty. The friend will feel like they’ve already proven their loyalty to you, and will expect special treatment.

Never reveal your true intentions. Create false intentions and make others believe they are your real intentions. If people don’t know your goals, they can not defend against you.

Speak sparingly. The more you talk, the more you expose. The more you expose, the less awesome you seem. Speak little to preserve your mystique and your privacy

Do not ignore or tolerate attacks against your reputation. Your reputation can defend you in any attack, but it is useless once damaged.

Make yourself the center of attention, lest you be forgotten about. The only reward for obscurity is more obscurity.

Take credit for other people’s work. You will seem like a miracle of speed and competence, and no one will remember those who made your success possible.

Never act first. Lure adversaries by seducing and enticing them. If your enemy come to you, you already have power over them.

Win by deeds, not debate. Debating only creates losers who bear grudges.

Avoid losers. Unhappiness and bad luck are contagious. Surround yourself with winners.

Make people depend on you. Do not teach them so much that they can get by without you. If other people need you, you are in control.

Seem generous and honest. People will relax and begin to trust you. Then they are vulnerable and effectively in your power.

Disarm rivals by appearing to be their friend. Ask questions. Draw them out. Gather information that will be useful to expose their weaknesses later.

Destroy your enemy completely. Do not leave them with the chance to fight another day.

Absent yourself to inspire awe and sometimes fear. When people see you too much, they do not respect you. Stay out of sight and people will value you.

Be unpredictable to inspire fear. People will exhaust themselves trying to figure you out.

Do not withdraw too much lest you find yourself out of the loop. If you isolate yourself, you cannot trust information coming from the outside. Be out and about enough to know what’s going on.

Seek to understand the people around you, but make no assumptions for people tend to pretend to be what they aren’t. Be good at reading people.

Make no promises. You are your only commitment.

Play dumb to keep people off their guard. If they feel like the smartest, they will shed all suspicion and fear, so you can manipulate them as you please.

If you are weaker than your opponent, surrender on terms that let you keep as much power as possible. Wait for your opponent to make a false step, and strike them when they least expect it.

Pick one goal and focus all your strength on it. Do not waste your energy or resources on multiple objectives.

Be courtly. Polish your skills in intrigue, manipulation, image, flattery, and conversation to assemble power. To control even the king, be the perfect courtier.

Reinvent yourself. Be dramatic; have signature gestures, deeds, even costumes. Distinguish yourself so people always know who you are.

Don’t do any dirty work. Use scapegoats to assume the blame.

Give people something to believe in; something to trust, someone to follow. Speak inspiringly and imply great promises, but spare the specifics so no one can accuse you of not following through. Your disciples will empower you.

Take bold, decisive actions. Never be timid or doubt yourself. The missteps of the bold are forgiven; the stumbles of the timid are not.

Plan everything. Plan each step, including the last one, and the one after that. Many have lost the fruit of their scheming by neglecting to plan the conclusion.

Make everything you do seem effortless. Amaze others with the ease of your accomplishment.

Deal the cards to control the game. You must seem to offer freedom of choice, but always give them choices that benefit you no matter which option they pick.

Never make people face the ugly truth. Give them the dreams they want and they will give you power.

Learn the weaknesses of others and exploit them. Inflict or relieve pain as serves your purpose.

Carry yourself like a king and people will treat you royally. Respect and value yourself and others will follow suit.

Timing is everything. Part of appearing confident is the virtue of patience. Always seem content and unhurried, as if you believe everything will work out in your favor.

Despise what is beyond your reach. If you acknowledge something, you empower it. If you ignore or despite what others covet and fear, you will seem superior.

Be spectacular. Use grand gestures and dramatic words to highlight yourself and draw attention.

Act like the crowd. There is no advantage in playing the eccentric or the fool. People will distrust and despise you if you go against the grain too much.

Never get angry. Leave that to your enemies. When they strike in anger, they will strike inaccurately, opening themselves to your cool, calculated counter attack.

Don’t look for a free lunch. Owe nothing. Do not rely on others. Make others rely on you.

Don’t try to fill the shoes of the great. If the shoes don’t fit, you’ll stumble and look like a fool. Stand out on your own merits. Venture off into new directions.

Strike the shepherd to scatter the sheep. Find the troublemaker of the group to take the entire group down.

Win hearts and minds. Do not force people to do your will. Charm them so that they will be eager to help you.

Enrage people by mirroring them. Force them to face themselves. They will only see themselves; they will not see you.

Talk about reform but make changes slowly. People love to talk about change, but they hate change itself. Make only small changes at a time.

Never look perfect lest people try to destroy you out of envy. Claim some faults that almost seem like virtues, but acknowledge them as faults.

When you reach your goal, stop. Don’t get too greedy or arrogant. Do not go farther until you have made a new plan.

Be fluid, so people cannot find your center and attack you. Like water, adapt to every vessel.

I say to my children, the reason that marriage - and having children - is so important is that it stops you thinking about yourself. The way to happiness is to give yourself to others and to think of others before you think of yourself.