I remember once having to stop performing when I thought an elderly man a few rows back from the front was actually going to die because he was laughing so hard.

People expect us to be different, but we're not. We're very similar people, and it's because we're so similar and close to each other that we make each other laugh - in fact we make each other laugh more than we make anyone else laugh.

We only have one agenda, which is to make 'em laugh their pants off. Unless they are girls, of course, when it is to make them laugh their bras off so we can get a quick look.

I'm waiting for the time when I fail - because we all fail - and I'm ready, I'll take up carpentry.

Most modern comedy is crap.

I've always had a kind of visual eye, and it was a pleasant exercise for that.

I don't claim that our TV comedies are highbrow in anyway, but I think there's a basis to them, and that's why they're more popular than other TV comedies. There's a basis of truth in them, a gut feeling.

We had so much fun in Ghana and they are really lovely people.

I remember once having to stop performing when I thought an elderly man a few rows back from the front was actually going to die because he was laughing so hard.

You're entering dangerous land when you start theorising about comedy.

The most fun I ever have is sitting in with Rick writing, and we laugh at our own jokes.

Richie and Eddie couldn't exist without each other. They're two halves of the same person.

From the stage I've seen people of all ages absolutely roaring at really good toilet humour.

Performers like Tommy Cooper, who are always getting things wrong, are much more endearing than comedians who are sassy and smart.

A lot of people are obsessed with looking cool. They feel they have to look after their image.

Even though we work in the same field, we have an intense private life away from our professional lives.

We have never been strictly political, only strictly funny.

It only works because we still amuse each other. After we have been working with other people, it is so refreshing to laugh unreservedly when we are back together again.

On stage, we just want to generate hysteria. We don't care about looking cool or posing.

I've never played a hero before so I jumped at the chance.

There is a lot of rubbish written about toilet humour - people saying it is childish and pretending it is beneath them - but there is no doubting the effectiveness of a really good willy gag.

It's definitely time to stop. We're getting too old. We both realised that the show wasn't as engaging as it used to be. We were starting to look a bit ridiculous.

In fact, Social Security is the only source of income nationwide for 29 percent of unmarried elderly women.

Traditionally, Medicare's assurance has been that for the elderly and persons with disabilities that they will not be alone when confronted with the full burden of their health care costs.

Obscenity is whatever happens to shock some elderly and ignorant magistrate.

A lot of kids do look up to us. But there are just as many elderly people to put us down.

I cannot forget a conversation that I had with an elderly couple from the tribe. They asked me whether I would kill them after I had finished. When I asked them why they asked that, they replied, Because you white men always do!

I know what I write about seems exotic to a lot of people, but not for me. I pulled up to an old trading post and saw a few elderly Navajos sitting on a bench. I felt right at home.

Many Americans are unaware that we still have a large population of working families, elderly, and children who rely on emergency food pantries, shelters, and other resources to meet their nutritional needs.

This administration is cutting the programs that our Nation and its citizens need most, while dissolving the safety nets created to protect the elderly and less fortunate in this wealthy Nation.

Let me be clear - I want all Louisiana citizens to have choice - including the elderly and persons with disabilities - and their families - who rely on the state for their care.

Some writing and production projects will be a great way to spend my elderly rock years.

We have a president who stole the presidency through family ties, arrogance and intimidation, employing Republican operatives to exercise the tactics of voter fraud by disenfranchising thousands of blacks, elderly Jews and other minorities.

So my father grew up in an orphanage in Boston. He was then adopted by an elderly childless couple from Maine, who gave him the name of Mitchell. He moved to Maine, and there he met my mother and was married.

Almost all my middle-aged and elderly acquaintances, including me, feel about 25, unless we haven't had our coffee, in which case we feel 107.

I remember once having to stop performing when I thought an elderly man a few rows back from the front was actually going to die because he was laughing so hard.

When a distinguished but elderly scientist states that something is possible, he is almost certainly right. When he states that something is impossible, he is very probably wrong.

If an elderly but distinguished scientist says that something is possible, he is almost certainly right; but if he says that it is impossible, he is very probably wrong.

And as a child I was filled with passionate admiration for acts of civic courage I had seen performed by an elderly military doctor, who was a friend of my family.

I believe that if you are elderly, physically or mentally handicapped we have an obligation too you, but if you are able-bodied, you should be working.

It was once said that the moral test of government is how that government treats those who are in the dawn of life, the children; those who are in the twilight of life, the elderly; and those who are in the shadows of life, the sick, the needy and the handicapped.

Hollywood does not write parts for people like me, an elderly gentleman, and when they find out you're crippled, forget about it. No, I'll never work again.

The University of Nebraska says that elderly people that drink beer or wine at least four times a week have the highest bone density. They need it - they're the ones falling down the most.

Without fullness of experience, length of days is nothing. When fullness of life has been achieved, shortness of days is nothing. That is perhaps why the young have usually so little fear of death; they live by intensities that the elderly have forgotten.

Social Security is one of the greatest achievements of the American government, protecting our elderly against poverty and assuring young people of a more secure future.

Why can't we build orphanages next to homes for the elderly? If someone were sitting in a rocker, it wouldn't be long before a kid will be in his lap.

It's true I don't tolerate fools but then they don't tolerate me, so I am spiky. Maybe that's why I'm quite good at playing spiky elderly ladies.

Germany, I think, was first to substitute a Social Security program for its elderly based on this premise, that is, that we would tax workers to pay retirement benefits for those retired.

Sure I'm for helping the elderly. I'm going to be old myself someday.