If only the strength of the love that people feel when it is reciprocated could be as intense and obsessive as the love we feel when it is not; then marriages would be truly made in heaven.

No collection of people who are all waiting for the same thing are capable of holding a natural conversation. Even if the thing they are waiting for is only a taxi.

I try hard not to preach, but I get carried away, which is a mistake, but it's a risk worth running.

Yes, OK, farty is a silly word. I wish I'd never used it. I'm 34. Perhaps it was a word for my 20s.

The earth only has so much bounty to offer and inventing ever larger and more notional prices for that bounty does not change its real value.

Sympathy for victims is always counter-balanced by an equal and opposite feeling of resentment towards them.

If only the strength of the love that people feel when it is reciprocated could be as intense and obsessive as the love we feel when it is not; then marriages would be truly made in heaven.

People who get through life dependent on other people's possessions are always the first to lecture you on how little possessions count.

We've all got to look at ourselves, start with yourself, that's all you can do. I believe that we can act responsibly as a group, it's just that there are vested interests telling us not to bother.

I'm easy to work with, not a pushover, but I respond to criticism and find it inspiring.

My advice to anyone adapting a novel is that once they've read it and learnt to understand it, then they must throw it away and never look at it again!

And roast beef and Yorkshire pudding is my personal signature dish.

Comedy will always be central to what I do, it's just an instinct for me, but I am a writer and always have been.

I don't consider myself Jewish. I am half-Jewish by race but not through my mother.

I don't know what people who I've never met think about me. Some have written horrible things, some have written nice things - but I'm proud of the fact I've remained close to everyone I've ever worked with.

I exercise hard and the reason I do is so that I can earn the things I like to consume.

I find the fact that billionaires are quoted as if the fact that they are billionaires gives them some kind of wisdom is outrageous.

I loved writing 'Two Brothers' more than anything else I have written. It's the first book I've written that I've always known I wanted to write. Having said that, it also kept me awake at nights.

I think it is very difficult to legislate for morality.

I think trying to be cool is the worst possible ambition - and I have never suffered from it.

I'm lucky because the strongest emotion I have ever felt is being in love, and that definitely informs my writing.

If I did things for the money, I'd have done adverts in the 1980s, when I was hot enough to be offered them, and 'Police Academy 6,' which I was asked to write.

My parents were secular. I am an atheist.

There are lots of things I could have done for the money, but I've made a great living doing the things I want to do.

You didn't wake up, your dreams just changed gear.

They didn't even like Margaret Thatcher but at least there was Margaret Thatcher. There have been women, you know, Sonia Gandhi for heaven's sakes in India.

To see a world in a grain of sand and heaven in a wild flower Hold infinity in the palms of your hand and eternity in an hour.

In the kingdom of heaven it is His work that will be crowned, not yours. Anything in you that He has not wrought Himself will count for nothing.

One does not need buildings, money, power, or status to practice the Art of Peace. Heaven is right where you are standing, and that is the place to train.

War, in some instances, especially defensive, has been authorized by Heaven.

Mankind is not likely to salvage civilization unless he can evolve a system of good and evil which is independent of heaven and hell.

Heaven is under our feet as well as over our heads.

Religion kept some of my relatives alive, because it was all they had. If they hadn't had some hope of heaven, some companionship in Jesus, they probably would have committed suicide, their lives were so hellish.

Death and life have their determined appointments; riches and honors depend upon heaven.

I'm terrified about the day that I enter the gates of heaven and God says to me, just a minute.

How well I have learned that there is no fence to sit on between heaven and hell. There is a deep, wide gulf, a chasm, and in that chasm is no place for any man.

Heaven grant us patience with a man in love.

I tell you the truth, it is hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven.

Order is heaven's first law.

Do you know that charming part of our country which has been called the garden of France - that spot where, amid verdant plains watered by wide streams, one inhales the purest air of heaven?

But of all plagues, good Heaven, thy wrath can send, Save me, oh, save me, from the candid friend!

Nothing is further than earth from heaven, and nothing is nearer than heaven to earth.

I live for those who love me, for those who know me true, for the heaven so blue above me, and the good that I can do.

Heaven lies about us in our infancy and the world begins lying about us pretty soon afterward.

Few nations have been so poor as to have but one god. Gods were made so easily, and the raw material cost so little, that generally the god market was fairly glutted and heaven crammed with these phantoms.

The Vietnamese have a secret weapon. It's their willingness to die beyond our willingness to kill. In effect, they've been saying, You can kill us, but you'll have to kill a lot of us; you may have to kill all of us. And, thank heaven, we are not yet ready to do that.

Woody is the guy who made me want to be a comic. I was in heaven and couldn't stop smiling because he was my idle and 29 years after seeing Take the Money and Run, I was working for him.

Christianity supplies a Hell for the people who disagree with you and a Heaven for your friends.

It is the artist who realizes that there is a supreme force above him and works gladly away as a small apprentice under God's heaven.