That is why, no matter how desperate the predicament is, I am always very much in earnest about clutching my cane, straightening my derby hat and fixing my tie, even though I have just landed on my head.

All my pictures are built around the idea of getting in trouble and so giving me the chance to be desperately serious in my attempt to appear as a normal little gentleman.

Life could be wonderful if people would leave you alone.

I thought I would dress in baggy pants, big shoes, a cane and a derby hat. everything a contradiction: the pants baggy, the coat tight, the hat small and the shoes large.

We might as well die as to go on living like this.

The hate of men will pass, and dictators die, and the power they took from the people will return to the people. And so long as men die, liberty will never perish.

Nothing is permanent in this wicked world - not even our troubles.

To truly laugh, you must be able to take your pain, and play with it!

I'd sooner be called a successful crook than a destitute monarch.

The glamour of it all! New York! America!

A tramp, a gentleman, a poet, a dreamer, a lonely fellow, always hopeful of romance and adventure.

I don't believe that the public knows what it wants; this is the conclusion that I have drawn from my career.

This is a ruthless world and one must be ruthless to cope with it.

The saddest thing I can imagine is to get used to luxury.

All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.

A man's true character comes out when he's drunk.

I do not have much patience with a thing of beauty that must be explained to be understood. If it does need additional interpretation by someone other than the creator, then I question whether it has fulfilled its purpose.

I went into the business for the money, and the art grew out of it. If people are disillusioned by that remark, I can't help it. It's the truth.

We think too much and feel too little.

To help a friend in need is easy, but to give him your time is not always opportune.

What do you want a meaning for? Life is a desire, not a meaning.

I am for people. I can't help it.

Laughter is the tonic, the relief, the surcease for pain.

I had no idea of the character. But the moment I was dressed, the clothes and the make-up made me feel the person he was. I began to know him, and by the time I walked onto the stage he was fully born.

A day without laughter is a day wasted.

I am at peace with God. My conflict is with Man.

Actors search for rejection. If they don't get it they reject themselves.

We all want to help one another. Human beings are like that. We want to live by each other's happiness, not by each other's misery.

In the end, everything is a gag.

I suppose that's one of the ironies of life doing the wrong thing at the right moment.

Dictators free themselves, but they enslave the people.

Remember, you can always stoop and pick up nothing.

Movies are a fad. Audiences really want to see live actors on a stage.

Failure is unimportant. It takes courage to make a fool of yourself.

I have no further use for America. I wouldn't go back there if Jesus Christ was President.

I remain just one thing, and one thing only, and that is a clown. It places me on a far higher plane than any politician.

Despair is a narcotic. It lulls the mind into indifference.

Why should poetry have to make sense?

Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot.

Man as an individual is a genius. But men in the mass form the headless monster, a great, brutish idiot that goes where prodded.

Brunettes are troublemakers. They're worse than the Jews.

That is why, no matter how desperate the predicament is, I am always very much in earnest about clutching my cane, straightening my derby hat and fixing my tie, even though I have just landed on my head.

Words are cheap. The biggest thing you can say is 'elephant'.

Only the unloved hate; the unloved and the unnatural.

My pain may be the reason for somebody's laugh. But my laugh must never be the reason for somebody's pain.

Nothing is permanent in this wicked world — not even our troubles.

Actors search for rejection. If they don't get it they reject themselves.

Brunettes are troublemakers. Theyre worse than the Jews.

My pain may be the reason for somebodys laugh. But my laugh must never be the reason for somebodys pain.