Clark Kerr

A university anywhere can aim no higher than to be as British as possible for the sake of the undergraduates, as German as possible for the sake of the public at large-and as confused as possible for the preservation of the whole uneasy balance.

The status quo is the only solution that cannot be vetoed.

I find that the three major administrative problems on a campus are sex for the students, athletics for the alumni and parking for the faculty.

The university is a series of individual entrepreneurs held together by a common grievance about parking.

The purpose of the university is to make students safe for ideas - not ideas safe for students.