D. L. Hughley

With a cigar like in life you got to have some length and some girth.

I used to always run off at the mouth and talk about people. I just didn't know that it would make a living for me.

I don't need somebody behind a desk to tell me what a marketing survey says is funny. I got 3 million miles and 70,000 tickets sold, telling me that I know how to make people laugh.

No matter how bad things are, you can at least be happy that you woke up this morning.

I'd pick a young white guy over an old white guy for president anytime because the younger guy is more likely to have been influenced by the great social changes of the '60s and '70s.

The one thing women love more than money is power.

Everybody wants to be great at something.

There's something about having a great bottle of wine and a great cigar. Nothing compares to it.

No matter how bad things are you can at least be happy that you woke up this morning.

One of the most beautiful things in the world I've ever seen or heard is people laughing, even when there seems to be so little reason for them to laugh.

Every group has its idiosyncrasies, but at a certain point we all are human.