You only think of the best comeback when you leave.

If you're a sports fan you realize that when you meet somebody, like a girlfriend, they kind of have to root for your team. They don't have a choice.

When I see professional clowns, mimes, or people who makes ballon animals, I think of their relatives and how disappointed they must be.

In New York, there are so many potholes, they're like craters on the moon. That's another traffic thing.

I, of course, wanted to do something with Drew Barrymore. Please. So we were reading scripts back and forth and then we found this script, Fever Pitch.

I don't shoot guns. I don't know how to do that. I grew Upstate New York, so I fought with my fists.

Sandler's always good. Tom Hanks gave me some good advice.

Leno, Conan. They are both really funny. They really know how to land one.

The running across the field thing, that was the first scene we shot in the movie. We asked the audience to stay for the scene, and 37,000 people stayed.

It's all about the script. Reality is key to me and less cutesy.

Listening is more important than talking. Just hit your mark and believe what you say. Just listen to people and react to what they are saying.

Don't keep reaching for the stars because you'll just look like an idiot stretching that way for no reason.

We had the guys from X Men 2 do the cameras. They had a 360 camera that would go from one car, up in the air and over to another car in a continuous shot while the film was still rolling, going 90 mph.

Arnold Schwarzenegger's publicist told USA Today that the actor has not ruled out running for governor of California, saying that he will make a decision soon. Reportedly Arnold needs that time to learn how to pronounce "gubernatorial."

Researches at Yale found a connection between brain cancer and work environment. The No. 1 most dangerous job for developing brain cancer? Plutonium hat model.

They got a great performance from me. I was happy.

There couldn't have been a better Hollywood ending for us. It's beyond baseball. It's rooting for your family.

The one thing you shouldn't do is try to tell a cab driver how to get somewhere.

I'm going to North Pole to help out Santa this year.

I just really don't like being the center of attention that much. It's kind of ironic.

I had a gun and I had to run and shoot, which is not easy.

Sometimes in a movie, the lines are so perfect.

I never sing in the shower. It's very dangerous.

I didn't act like I was there. I just got into the story.

I sing in the car if I'm in LA, because you're like soundproofed.

You only think of the best comeback when you leave.

We picked the Red Sox because they lose. If you root for something that loses for 86 years, you're a pretty good fan. You don't have to win everything to be a fan of something.

Researches tested a new form of medical marijuana that treats pain but doesn't get the user high, prompting patients who need medical marijuana to declare, "Thank you?"

The fans were so psyched that someone was doing a movie about a Boston fan that they were giving their all.

'Have fun' is my message. Be silly. You're allowed to be silly. There's nothing wrong with it.

'Moldova: Yes or No?' That's a great app, and we actually used the geo-locator on your phone, so if you are in Moldova, it will say 'Yes, you're in Moldova.' I'm so excited. People need that. That's the whole point. The whole reason you buy a $500 phone is to see if you are... in Moldova. Or not.

Arnold Schwarzenegger's publicist told USA Today that the actor has not ruled out running for governor of California, saying that he will make a decision soon. Reportedly Arnold needs that time to learn how to pronounce 'gubernatorial.'

Everyone looks so much better when they smile.

I became a Yankees fan for a few years. But now, I gotta say, I'm really rooting for the Red Sox.

I can watch an episode of Jerry Seinfeld, and by the end, I'm just walking around my house, you know, talking like Jerry Seinfeld. 'What is that? What are you doing? Who is it? What's going' - you know, I just had that thing, when I grew up, I'd just start talking like people. You know, I always had that.

I don't want to admit it, but I do enjoy the feedback from the audience. It's instant feedback. It's like, you could do a movie, shoot it for a year, wait six months, it comes out and you gotta do three weeks of marketing. Three weeks of that, and everyone goes, 'It sucks.'

I honestly, purposely have not gone to therapy because I know some crazy stuff's going to be dragged up and, you know, I'll be like, 'Wait, what?'

I just feel like people like a little break. Especially at 12:37 at night, you go, like, 'I'm just tired of the snarky right now. I just want to lie down and have somebody make me laugh for an hour. Entertain me, and then I'm going to sleep with a smile on my face.' That's my job; that's what I do.

I like being absurd. Being silly.

I like video games, I like tech, I like being positive.

I read one chapter of a book and put it down. Thank God for Kindle.

I want to be a dad. That's floating to the top of my list. I think it's such an important thing. I'm at the age where everyone has kids, and I ask them, 'Is it like a puppy?' And they go, 'It's 10 times a puppy.'

I wanted to be a Priest at one point. I was pretty religious. I was an altar boy, and I was good at it. Then, I started meeting girls and I'm like 'You know, maybe I shouldn't be a Priest.'

I wanted to be the next Dana Carvey. This was my ultimate goal. If I ever cut into a birthday cake and made a wish, I would wish to be on 'Saturday Night Live.' If I threw a coin into a fountain, I would wish to be on 'Saturday Night Live.' If I saw a shooting star, I would wish to be on 'Saturday Night Live.'

I was into the Mets because my Dad worked at IBM where he got free Mets tickets, so I was into the Mets... then I got to 'Saturday Night Live' where my boss has unbelievable N.Y. Yankees tickets, so he invites us to the games. I'm going to all the games, so I might as well root for the team I'm gonna go sit with.

I'd be nothing without my wife. She's the coolest. She's the greatest. She is the smartest. She's the funniest. I love her so much. She's like the - it's like your best friend for the rest of your life.

I'd do entire music videos in my bedroom, where I used to stand in front of my television memorizing the moves to Michael Jackson's 'Beat It.'

If people want to see you, they'll find you. If they don't see you on TV, they'll find you on the Internet.

L.A., it's nice, but I think of sunshine and people on rollerblades eating sushi. New York, I think of nighttime, I think of Times Square and Broadway and nightlife and the city that never sleeps.