The more cynical you become, the better off you'll be.

I keep waiting for the roof to cave in. I was raised to follow the Golden Rule, you know, treat people the way you wish to be treated. That's kind of the way I live my life. Maybe someone up there likes me for that.

And if you have great writing, it's really easy, but if it's not so great and you have to work a little harder, I could tell where the work needed to be done but comedy is just fun.

I am not bisexual. I am not gay. I have never had sex with men.

Having kids has been great for me. I have two beautiful step- kids, as well as my own new daughter. They've really helped me to keep my feet firmly on the ground, and life is good. I feel like I'm the luckiest guy here.

The more cynical you become, the better off you'll be.

When I was younger and studying acting, I never ever saw myself in the sitcom world; it was drama that really turned me on and still does.

Why do you have to break up with her? Be a man. Just stop calling.

Comedy is just to me, maybe it's a natural knack, if I can see where the joke is in the writing and I can see where the setup is and I can tell this is the way to make it.

As an actor, the biggest compliment you can get, in my book is for someone to believe that you're the character.

I find the earth to be a place of misery in which I am surrounded by the conformity that kills society.

Misery is manifold. The wretchedness of the earth is multiform.

I've grown tremendously as an actor by being there. It is comic writing the likes of which I don't know that I'll ever see again and it's been a great, great experience.

I don't like silk underwear. They don't do the job, you know?

This whole acting thing was always just for me and was always an absolute shot in the dark. If it didn't pan out, I had my hammer and tool belt, banging nails again tomorrow if I had to.

In comedy, you have to be unafraid to hang from the tree branch naked in the high wind and you have to be absolutely unafraid to look ridiculous and silly.

You basically have a group of four spies who are chosen for a mission they feel for the fact of how competent they are and how their expertise and they're the right one for the job. But ultimately they find out they've been actually chosen for their incompetence.

'Friends' was a true ensemble. There really was no star of the show.

'Friends' was an education in intelligent comedic banter; in intelligent vernacular. It was an education in scene study. It was an education in group dynamic. I came out of there with a master's degree in comedy.

I believe that laughter is the best emotional Band-Aid in the world. It's like nature's Neosporin.

I could build and roof a house, though electricity is not my thing.

I have funny bones. If there's ever any kind of tension, I'll always be the one to try and be funny to loosen things up.

I really like the half-hour comedy. I really do. I know people that are in movies all the time and they, you know, they don't see their families as much. And that takes its toll over time.

I'm much more low-key than the characters I've played.

It's funny - nowadays people that are famous get chased by paparazzi. They have this fame, but they don't have the money to hide from it.

When there's writing that you really trust, it's very freeing as an artist.

You can't be funny if you don't have good material.

When I really want to learn about something, I write a book on it. Then the real research begins, as I begin to hear people's stories, and huge amounts of information begins to comes straight to my doorstep. Then I can write an even better book the next time!

There are things I am more interested in than the clone thing. How are they trying to find their place in the world and make sense of their lives? To what extent can they transcend their fate? As time starts to run out, what are the things that really matter?

When I see old movies with women in floor-length dressing gowns, or when they're going to the store and they've got a pillbox hat with a net over the eyes and white gloves, I'm offended that I can't go to the store like that.

In peace, children inter their parents; war violates the order of nature and causes parents to inter their children.

You have to think big to be big.

Art has been good for my soul. And it's been good for my brain. I think I'm a better painter now than I was a musician growing up. You struggle to see things and translate an image through your hands to a canvas.

As a good horse is not very apt to jump over a bank, if left to guide himself, I let mine pick his own way.

They're not supposed to show prison films in prison. Especially ones that are about escaping.

People only see permissiveness in the sense of having more.

Tears gratify a savage nature, they do not melt it.

I'm Jewish. I don't work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, He would have put diamonds on the floor.

I've been really lucky thus far with acting, in that I can do things I believe in and feel good about, and feel good about myself. If for some reason one day that ends, I won't do it anymore. If I feel like I have to compromise myself to continue to be in this industry, I don't want to do that.

A team will always appreciate a great individual if he's willing to sacrifice for the group.

It's not easy to define poetry.

I would never play any role in anything that involves the United Nations for obvious reasons.

Football sometimes is stressful. Music is more of a kind of laid-back type, chilled-out kind of activity. It kind of keeps me balanced, I guess.

If I read something great and I want to go after it, I go after it. You don't wait to see what Hollywood wants to do with you. You decide what you want to do. I don't mind fighting when I really want something.

The utterly fallacious idea at the heart of the pro-war argument is that it is the duty of the anti-war argument to provide an alternative to war. The onus is on them to explain just cause.

There has been enough blood in the Balkans. Serbia is offering its hand. Let us turn to the future and not deal with the past.

Now workers should have the right to join unions. But unions should not be forced upon workers. And unions should not have the power to take money our of their members' paychecks to buy the support of politicians that are favored by the union bosses.

We want to be first not first if not first but but first

Let the pitcher move first, then, as he draws his arm back, you draw the bat back and you are ready.