I would love it if you would come in and teach me how to really do you.

I would love it if you would come in and teach me how to really do you.

Because you want to keep an air of calm and cool.

No, no, no. Your accent is so beautiful.

Before I had children, everything about my life was devoted to Saturday Night Live.

I don't know if comedy is a male sport. I always wondered that.

I feel like I come from a smaller off shoot of black people because I am mixed. People say I'm African American but that doesn't include the other half of me.

I feel like I'm a drag queen.

I get anxious. That lovely Jewish guilt that comes with ancestry.

I have an equal opportunity womb!

I learned the enormous power of writing for yourself, especially now that people seem to be receptive to the fact that women can write.

I like comedy as a group sport.

I never thought I'd get a chance to do what I'm doing. It's such a dream.

I really love laughing.

I still have a fantasy of being a musician when I grow up.

I think that people who don't like kids are awful people.

I was a loud child, and if my mother sang to me, I would be quiet.

I've been writing joke songs since I was a kid and it served me well at S.N.L. I can write those in my sleep. In fact, I have.

I've met people who are baffled by children, as though they were never children themselves.

I've never set out to write a funny movie or be a funny comedian as a woman. I am a woman. I don't really have a choice in the matter. My goal is just to be funny.

If my time with my kids is shorter than it was yesterday, it's better than nothing.

Lord knows I had what you could call many fashion Don'ts in my day.

Most of my life I didn't feel very normal. There's definitely been some moments where I feel like, all right, I've finally graduated and I'm a normal lady.

There are days when I wonder why my mom couldn't be here to see this.

To grow up with the loss of your mother is a scar that never goes away.

To have your childhood dream realized is a really big deal.

Without a doubt in sketch comedy there are fewer women than men.

You don't want to be the first person to tell your 5-year-old, like, 'You're going to have a life filled with disappointments and letdowns - enjoy!'

I dont look my best when I wake up. But I do feel beautiful when Im tired and happy and Ive had a good laugh and a glass of champagne.

We assume that celebrities have it easy and so love to watch them having to endure a bit of hardship.

I love Nautilus and stretching. The results are immediate, and that gives me the motivation to continue.

I am a ordinary teenager. I fall in love like everyone else.

I don't call you handsome, sir, though I love you most dearly: far too dearly to flatter you. Don't flatter me.

The essential elements of giving are power and love - activity and affection - and the consciousness of the race testifies that in the high and appropriate exercise of these is a blessedness greater than any other.

My mother keeps things in perspective for me. She makes me realize that the acting I do and love is no more important than what one of my brothers does-he works in a shoe repair shop. If my career ever tapers off, I'll go to college.

Actors love mental disorders, dialects, and corsets. Give them one of the three and they're happy.

My goal is, of course, for this show to do well, and I would love it if people liked it.

I love living on that stage. Without that, I'd die.

I love my DSL, but I love my WiFi more. And I probably get on the Internet 40 percent to 50 percent more because of the combination of those technologies.

But I love New York. I used to set my alarm clock when I was there, and get up at 4am and get a coffee, just because I could.

I love children and I love men, but I can't commit to either for the rest of my life.

Sitting at home the way I do, I'd just love the hear from people. It'd be a great help in passing the time.

The wise are wise only because they love. The fool are fools only because they think they can understand love.

We can recognize the dawn and the decline of love by the uneasiness we feel when alone together.

Love is a mutual self-giving which ends in self-recovery.

People react to fear, not love; they don't teach that in Sunday School, but it's true.

I sort of understood that when I first started: that you shouldn't repeat a success. Very often you're going to, and maybe the first time you do, it works. And you love it. But then you're trapped.

There is love there. And then there's times when I can't even stomach Simon. You don't have to sit next to him. That's all I have to say.

When I see children, I see the face of God. That's why I love them so much. That's what I see.