At dramatic rehearsals, the only author that's better than an absent one is a dead one.

When I was born I owed twelve dollars.

At dramatic rehearsals, the only author that's better than an absent one is a dead one.

Satire is what closes on Saturday night.

When I invite a woman to dinner, I expect her to look at my face. That's the price she has to pay.

Office hours are from 12 to 1 with an hour off for lunch.

Epitaph for a dead waiter - God finally caught his eye.

I like terra firma; the more firma, the less terra.

I understand your new play is full of single entendres.

The kind of doctor I want is one who when he's not examining me is home studying medicine.

A woman with a voice is by definition a strong woman. But the search to find that voice can be remarkably difficult.

At the start, I had no idea to go into fashion, because I thought people would think I was stupid. I don't worry about those things anymore.

Forty years ago the chances of journalists reporting - or the authorities even prosecuting - a pro athlete were practically nil.

Being a new band, I just can't think of a better way to get your name out to all of the Hard-Rock crowd than playing with twenty of the biggest Hard-Rock bands in the world.

In spite of warnings, nothing much happens until the status quo becomes more painful than change.

It is extraordinary to see the sea; what a spectacle! She is so unfettered that one wonders whether it is possible that she again become calm.

Israel is following policies which maximise its security threats... policies which choose expansion over security... policies which lead to their moral degradation, their isolation, their delegitimation, as they call it now, and very likely ultimate destruction. That's not impossible.

I think I have between twenty and thirty commercials playing at present.

I'm 27. I feel like I get it. I'm OK with being sexy if I feel like it. Some days I'm brainy, some days I'm funny, some days I'm sexy, and sometimes, I just want to dance.

It's not good to put in a magazine what I weigh because it's too little. People freak out when they hear what I weigh. They think, 'Oh, you're too skinny.'

The securities laws of the 1930s were so important because it forced companies to file registration statements and issue prospectuses, and it remedied the imbalance of information.

Television is much more difficult because at every moment the network can force you to change things based on their belief about what would make it popular. You're in a constant debate with a gun at your head, and the gun is cancellation. So it's hard to win the arguments.

One who has no love in his heart will try to possess everything for himself. One who has love in his heart is ready to sacrifice everything, including his own body, for the benefit of others.

The footsteps a child follows are most likely to be the ones his parents thought they covered up.

It's weird to say, but every time I look at my daughter and I see this little living breathing thing that came from me, that represents all of the hopes and dreams that I would want for her, I see a miracle.

The full moon of June will fall on Friday the 13th. This is a very rare event the next time a full moon will fall on Friday the 13th will be 2049.

When I'm gigging, there's an uneasy shift when I pull a puppet out. People look at me aghast and I feel I have about 20 seconds to win them over. You even get the prejudice among other people in your own profession.

It never rains but it pours.

I'm always frightened away by movies that lower the bar on our endeavor to learn more about the crazy weird creatures that we are.

I'm definitely a risk-taker with my music.

Historians don't really like to carry on speculative debates, but you could certainly argue that the likelihood of a Soviet invasion of Western Europe was extremely, extremely low.

We neither get better or worse as we get older, but more like ourselves.

I'm working on Leno. He's from my home state, Massachusetts. And my home country, Italy. I said, 'Hey, Jay, why don't you have me on your show? Afraid I'll be funnier than you?'

We're living in a time where I think most people are wanting someone to invite them respectfully to a policy position, not try to just slash and burn the other person.