I always wanted to be an artist, whatever that was, like other chicks want to be stewardesses. I read. I painted. I thought.
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Playing is just about feeling. Playing isn't necessarily about misery. Playing isn't necessarily about happiness. But it's just about letting yourself feel all those things that you have already on the inside of you, but you're all the time trying to push them aside because they don't make for polite conversation or something.