Good morning is a contradiction of terms.

There are so many opportunities in life, that the loss of two or three capabilities is not necessarily debilitating. A handicap can give you the opportunity to focus more on art, writing, or music.

Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie.

Way down deep, we're all motivated by the same urges. Cats have the courage to live by them.

Good morning is a contradiction of terms.

Avoid fruits and nuts. You are what you eat.

Cats are anthropomorphised in art because they are so laid back that you automatically attribute human thoughts and feelings to them.

Cats rule the world.

I can go everywhere and no one recognises me.

I didn't have a whole lot of success getting dates, I was always a bit of a geek.

I probably get more inspiration for human stories and idiosyncrasies than I do animal stories.

I stop short of being a workaholic.

I thought if I could create a convincing cat I could say and do anything I wanted on the human condition.

I was in and out of comas until I was nine and I would lose entire days and weeks. The novelty of being able to really do stuff hasn't worn off - I still feel like I'm making up for lost time.

I was very happy and honored to create the Professor Garfield Foundation with Ball State to make reading fun.

I'm still a farm boy at heart. If I hadn't suffered from asthma as a child, I would be a farmer today.

My dream in life is to write the one gag that makes everyone in the world laugh.

Readers have told me that their children have learned to read after years of struggle after starting to read Garfield's comic strip and many people who have moved to the United States have said that they, too, learned English by reading Garfield.

The understatement is the English contribution to comedy.

Usually I commit to something in my head and then I start drawing.

When you're through with your cat, you can't throw it in the trash.

You have to do something when you're lying in bed. So you play with your mind.

You'd have to go a long way to find someone who was more proud and grateful for what our veterans have done for all of us.

Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake zucchini bread and pumpkin pie.

He who fills His pockets with the Rocks of Misdeeds shall surely sink in the River of Good Fortune.

The world is a perpetual caricature of itself; at every moment it is the mockery and the contradiction of what it is pretending to be.

We are only falsehood, duplicity, contradiction; we both conceal and disguise ourselves from ourselves.

I believe that truth has only one face: that of a violent contradiction.

That the sun will not rise tomorrow is no less intelligible a proposition, and implies no more contradiction, than the affirmation, that it will rise.

In formal logic, a contradiction is the signal of defeat, but in the evolution of real knowledge it marks the first step in progress toward a victory.

What I claim is to live to the full the contradiction of my time, which may well make sarcasm the condition of truth.

Good taste and humor are a contradiction in terms, like a chaste whore.

It was not simply out of a spirit of contradiction that I exposed a light source to magnetic forces. The idea came to me during an investigation of the effect discovered by Kerr on light reflected by magnetic mirrors.

There is no contradiction between effective law enforcement and respect for civil and human rights. Dr. King did not stir us to move for our civil rights to have them taken away in these kinds of fashions.

Darwinism as presented by Darwin contradicted idealistic philosophy, and this contradiction grew deeper with the development of its materialist teaching.

Contradiction was something I really like when it is embraced in that kind of philosophy.

I regard the principle of conscription of life as a flat contradiction of all our cherished ideals of individual freedom, democratic liberty and Christian teaching.

Say to all small and great, and that often, that fully, quickly and willingly, without grumbling and contradiction, they do all your commands that are not against God.

We don't perceive a contradiction between writing books, making films or producing a television program. These days you can't choose how you want to express yourself anymore.

It does not seem that the contradiction which exists between the aristocratic function of art and the democratic structure of modern society can ever be resolved.

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.

There is, I conceive, no contradiction in believing that mind is at once the cause of matter and of the development of individualised human minds through the agency of matter.

He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife.

Do what you will, this world's a fiction and is made up of contradiction.

To write a book about improvisation is partly a contradiction in terms. Improvisation is spontaneous. It's in the moment.

Such, Polly, are your sex - part truth, part fiction; - Some thought, much whim and all a contradiction.

The exercise of authority over the same area by two States is a contradiction.

That was my first lesson from Ben-Gurion. Then I saw him making peace, and I saw him making war. He mobilized me before the war. The man was a very rare combination between a real intellectual and a born leader. There is a contradiction between the two.

I now add, farther, that the apostle's argument is so far from proving it to be the duty of people to obey, and submit to, such rulers as act in contradiction to the public good, and so to the design of their office, that it proves the direct contrary.