I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog.

People always come up to me and say that my smoking is bothering them... Well, it's killing me!

My mother always said don't marry for money, divorce for money.

Is there a doctor in the house? My parents want me to marry you.

My mom was a ventriloquist and she always was throwing her voice. For ten years I thought the dog was telling me to kill my father.

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog.

I don't think I was funny until college. I lived with some Harvard MD/PhD students - they were so smart, and what I contributed to the house was, I was the funny one.

I think there have always been funny women, from Carol Burnett to Joan Rivers. When the audience sees a woman, they innately know she's worked twice as hard to get there, she's had to prove that she can be the leader, first, and then be funny on top of it. She has to emit a confidence that she's in control.

I took an acting class. After the first day, the teacher quit, so they said take another. When I saw 'How to be a Stand-up Comedian,' it resonated. I realized I'd rather make 200 people laugh than make one person cry.

I've been pitching a show of five female stand-up comedians through the generations, from Phyllis Diller to Amy Schumer, so when I got an e-mail asking me if I would participate in the Women in Comedy Festival, I was thrilled.

People always come up to me and say that my smoking is bothering them... Well its killing me

My mother always said dont marry for money divorce for money.

Im going to get married again because Im more mature now and I need some kitchen stuff.

I go running when I have to. When the ice cream truck is doing sixty.

A blind man can make art if what is in his mind can be passed to another mind in some tangible form.

Thoughts without content are empty, intuitions without concepts are blind.

But I tend to think of the expressive part of me as rather tedious - never curious or responsive, but blind and self-serving.

I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face.

Effective use of Braille is as important to the blind as independent mobility, knowledge in the use of adaptive technology, and the core belief that equality, opportunity and security are truly possible for all people who are blind.

Let hope inspire you, but let not idealism blind you. Don't look back, you can never look back.

The issue in Web accessibility is the fact that blind and visually-impaired people need the single biggest boost to achieve equivalence, since the real-world Web is a visual medium.

At times one feels that what is being said in the West is that the fact that you are a Muslim predisposes you to this blind, stupid terrorism.

I generally wade in blind and trust to fate and instinct to see me through.

Will power is to the mind like a strong blind man who carries on his shoulders a lame man who can see.

I feel like a wet seed wild in the hot blind earth.

Be to their virtue very kind; be to their faults a little blind.

Bogart could have been color blind. He got to know a man before he decided if he liked him or not.

Well it has been very exciting and very changing as well. Celebrating the 40th year and having the album out and the Channel 4 documentary and I resigned from Blind Date.

About every two minutes a new wave of planes would be over. The motors seemed to grind rather than roar, and to have an angry pulsation like a bee buzzing in blind fury.

The Blind Boys are truly the deepest well of American musical heritage you can discover.

Let Justice, blind and halt and maimed, chastise the rebel spirit surging in my veins, let the Law deal me penalties and pains And make me hideous in my neighbours' eyes.

Violence and racism are bad. Whenever they occur they are to be condemned and we should not turn a blind eye to them.

Every new baby is a blind desperate vote for survival: people who find themselves unable to register an effective political protest against extermination do so by a biological act.

Research is the process of going up alleys to see if they are blind.

Being the only non-Black was a unique experience. After a few weeks, you're not aware of skin color differences. You see the color; you're not blind, but it doesn't matter. You see the human being first.

Is puppy love the reason so many Americans are blind to the incompetence and waste of Republicans - who at a minimum are supposed to be good money managers - running Iraq reconstruction?

It should be clear by now that my focus here is not freedom of speech or the press. This freedom is all too often an exaggeration. At the very least, blind references to freedom of speech or the press serve as a distraction from the critical examination of other communications policies.

Necessity is blind until it becomes conscious. Freedom is the consciousness of necessity.

Afflicted by love's madness all are blind.

I studied with a blind teacher from about 5 until I was 16, at two different schools. From the age of 12 until 16, I was in a boarding school-which, I believe, at that time was compulsory for blind children.

But I'm so slow on it because I find it terribly hard writing blind on computers. The computer speaks to me, but it's just so slow, I'm so terribly slow using it.

You can tell it's good if you light it and a blue flame comes up; that means it's good moonshine and it won't make you go blind.

Every unskilled illegal immigrant who enters the United States for work drives up healthcare costs for every American. And, every illegal immigrant we turn a blind eye toward weakens the rule of law our country is founded on.

Every man can see things far off but is blind to what is near.

It is the custom of the Roman Church which I unworthily serve with the help of God, to tolerate some things, to turn a blind eye to some, following the spirit of discretion rather than the rigid letter of the law.

Experience is the cane of the blind.

Peace was declared, but not all of us were drunk with joy or stricken blind.

It is we that are blind, not fortune.

Your desires and true beliefs have a way of playing blind man's bluff. You must corner the inner facts.