It is a good deed to forget a poor joke.

What the hell difference does it make, left or right? There were good men lost on both sides.

All publicity is good, except an obituary notice.

It is a good deed to forget a poor joke.

New York is my Lourdes, where I go for spiritual refreshment... a place where you're least likely to be bitten by a wild goat.

Ah, bless you, Sister, may all your sons be bishops.

I am a drinker with writing problems.

When I came back to Dublin I was courtmartialed in my absence and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.

I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper and the old men and old women warmer in the winter and happier in the summer.

The Bible was a consolation to a fellow alone in the old cell. The lovely thin paper with a bit of matress stuffing in it, if you could get a match, was as good a smoke as I ever tasted.

I was court-martialled in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.

I am a daylight atheist.

I wish I'd been a mixed infant.

I say myself no depressed words just depressed minds.

Critics are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how it's done, they've seen it done every day, but they're unable to do it themselves.

Other people have a nationality. The Irish and the Jews have a psychosis.

I have never seen a situation so dismal that a policeman couldn't make it worse.

If it was raining soup, the Irish would go out with forks.

There is no such thing as bad publicity except your own obituary.

It's not that the Irish are cynical. It's rather that they have a wonderful lack of respect for everything and everybody.

Shakespeare said pretty well everything and what he left out, James Joyce, with a judge from meself, put in.

One drink is too many for me and a thousand not enough.

The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.

The most important things to do in the world are to get something to eat, something to drink and somebody to love you.

At the innermost core of all loneliness is a deep and powerful yearning for union with one’s lost self.

At the innermost core of all loneliness is a deep and powerful yearning for union with ones lost self.

Whats a crook only a businessman without a shop.

When I came back to Dublin I was courtmartialed in my absence and sentenced to death in my absence so I said they could shoot me in my absence.

Now I see that going out into the testing ground of men it is the tongue and not the deed that wins the day.

Neither gods nor men can foresee when an evil deed will bear its fruit.

The smallest deed is better than the grandest intention.

With every deed you are sowing a seed, though the harvest you may not see.

In the final analysis there is no other solution to man's progress but the day's honest work, the day's honest decision, the day's generous utterances, and the day's good deed.

How far that little candle throws its beams! So shines a good deed in a naughty world.

It is a good deed to forget a poor joke.

A good deed never goes unpunished.

The deed is everything, the glory is naught.

One brave deed makes no hero.

While we are living in the present, we must celebrate life every day, knowing that we are becoming history with every work, every action, every deed.

Western history has been a history of deed done, actions performed and results achieved.

It is futile to judge a kind deed by its motives. Kindness can become its own motive. We are made kind by being kind.

The last temptation is the greatest treason: to do the right deed for the wrong reason.

No baseness or cruelty of treason so deep or so tragic shall enter our human world, but that loyal love shall be able in due time to oppose to just that deed of treason its fitting deed of atonement.

The purpose firm is equal to the deed.

We acknowledge and bewail our manifold sins and wickedness, which we, from time to time, most grievously have committed, by thought, word and deed.

No great deed is done by falterers who ask for certainty.

We may never be strong enough to be entirely nonviolent in thought, word and deed. But we must keep nonviolence as our goal and make strong progress towards it.

He has the deed half done who has made a beginning.

Always aim at complete harmony of thought and word and deed. Always aim at purifying your thoughts and everything will be well.