You know, that's the only good thing about divorce; you get to sleep with your mother.

It is matrimonial suicide to be jealous when you have a really good reason.

Male supremacy has kept woman down. It has not knocked her out.

There is nothing harder than the softness of indifference.

In the final analysis there is no other solution to man's progress but the day's honest work, the day's honest decision, the day's generous utterances, and the day's good deed.

Censorship, like charity, should begin at home, but, unlike charity, it should end there.

I refuse the compliment that I think like a man, thought has no sex, one either thinks or one does not.

They say that women talk too much. If you have worked in Congress you know that the filibuster was invented by men.

A man's home may seem to be his castle on the outside; inside is more often his nursery.

But if God wanted us to think with our wombs, why did he give us a brain.

Thoughts have no sex.

But if God had wanted us to think just with our wombs, why did He give us a brain?

There are no hopeless situations; there are only men who have grown hopeless about them.

The politicians were talking themselves red, white and blue in the face.

A man has only one escape from his old self: to see a different self in the mirror of some woman's eyes.

You know, that's the only good thing about divorce; you get to sleep with your mother.

There is nothing like a good dose of another woman to make a man appreciate his wife.

The women who inspired this play deserved to be smacked across the head with a meat ax and that, I flatter myself, is exactly what I smacked them with.

In politics women type the letters, lick the stamps, distribute the pamphlets and get out the vote. Men get elected.

Advertising has done more to cause the social unrest of the 20th century than any other single factor.

Politicians talk themselves red, white, and blue in the face.

The oppressed never free themselves - they do not have the necessary strengths.

Women know what men have long forgotten. The ultimate economic and spiritual unit of any civilization is still the family.

Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed. If I fail, no one will say, "She doesn't have what it takes"; They will say, "Women don't have what it takes".

They say women talk too much. If you have worked in Congress you know that the filibuster was invented by men.

I don't have a warm personal enemy left. They've all died off. I miss them terribly because they helped define me.

Nature abhors a virgin - a frozen asset.

Technological man can't believe in anything that can't be measured, taped, or put into a computer.

Courage is the ladder on which all the other virtues mount.

A woman's best protection is a little money of her own.

No good deed goes unpunished.

Lying increases the creative faculties, expands the ego, and lessens the frictions of social contacts.

Money can't buy happiness, but it can make you awfully comfortable while you're being miserable.

Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed. If I fail, no one will say, 'She doesn't have what it takes'; They will say, 'Women don't have what it takes.'

Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed. If I fail, no one will say, 'She doesn't have what it takes.' They will say, 'Women don't have what it takes.'

A mans home may seem to be his castle on the outside inside is more often his nursery.

Censorship like charity should begin at home but unlike charity it should end there.

Communism is the opiate of the intellectuals with no cure except as a guillotine might be called a cure for dandruff.

Lying increases the creative faculties expands the ego and lessens the frictions of social contacts.

A man has only one escape from his old self to see a different self in the mirror of some womans eyes.

The main thing is to get what little happiness there is out of life in this wartorn world because these are the good old days now.

Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed. If I fail, no one will say, she doesn't have what it takes. They will say, women don't have what it takes.

All history shows that the hand that cradles the rock has ruled the world, not the hand that rocks the cradle!

I hate failure and that divorce was a Number One failure in my eyes. It was the worst period of my life. Neither Desi nor I have been the same since, physically or mentally.

I swear, if you existed I'd divorce you.

Please do not ask me to talk about my divorce. Mr. Ziegfeld and I are such very good friends. It is only a little matter quite between ourselves.

Divorce is the psychological equivalent of a triple coronary bypass.

A divorce is like an amputation: you survive it, but there's less of you.

You can fire your secretary, divorce your spouse, abandon your children. But they remain your co-authors forever.