New rumors that Saddam Hussein is planning to flee to a castle in Libya with 10 billion dollars. Now President Bush doesn't know whether to nuke him or give him a tax cut.

Democrats were quick to point out that President Bush's budget creates a 1 trillion dollar deficit. The White House quickly responded with 'Hey, look over there, it's Saddam Hussein.'

President Bush spent last night calling world leaders to support the war with Iraq and it is sad when the most powerful man on earth is yelling, 'I know you're there, pick up, pick up.

They're saying Arnold will get 95% of the vote. At least according to his brother, Jeb Schwarzenegger.

The big political news, Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he's running for governor of California, and already, people are chanting, 'Four more vowels, four more vowels.'

People here in Los Angeles are disgusted now about a sex scandal involving Arnold Schwarzenegger. Apparently for seven years, he carried on a sexual relationship with his own wife.

Did you see the statue topple? Bill Clinton got nostalgic seeing something that big in a beret go down.

John Kerry was officially endorsed by Dick Gephardt, and Kerry said, 'What did I ever do to you?'

As fighting in Iraq intensifies, President Bush delivered his supplemental war budget to Congress. The money will cover 30 days of fighting, then we'll be sent one war every other month until we cancel our subscription.

New rumors that Saddam Hussein is planning to flee to a castle in Libya with 10 billion dollars. Now President Bush doesn't know whether to nuke him or give him a tax cut.

Senator Hillary Clinton is attacking President Bush for breaking his campaign promise to cut carbon dioxide emissions, saying a promise made, a promise broken. And then out of habit, she demanded that Bush spend the night on the couch.

In Massachusetts, scientists have created the first human clone. The bad thing is that in thirty years, the clone will still be depressed because the Boston Red Sox will still have not won a World Series.

A telephone survey says that 51 percent of college students drink until they pass out at least once a month. The other 49 percent didn't answer the phone.

Broadcasting was something, I don't want to say it came easy, but it's something I'm comfortable doing.

CBS was very generous in their offer to re-sign me. But I simply want to try something new.

However, frat-boy humor is funny and it always will be.

I enjoyed retirement the right way... linguine con vongole, red wine and plenty of truffle cheese.

I have a wonderful respect for old people.

I learned at an early age that using the third person will push some buttons.

I lived in a studio apartment until my mid-30s. I don't have an extravagant lifestyle.

I think mankind is overly sensitive, very needy, greedy, and flawed.

I used to make fun of young people when I was 17 - the angst, the insecurities, all those tattoos.

I'm going to miss my best friends - my cameras.

It's fun being creative and that's satisfying.

My brother asked me once, 'Are you a misanthrope?' And I said, 'No, I just find people irritating.'

People who go into show business are screwed up.

The places I've worked in the past, I always stayed three years and moved on.

The sodomy laws have been overturned so now we can overturn each other.

I did work out every day. I needed it to have the endurance to do what needed to be done and not get hurt. I have such a new respect for action stars now.

Many are needed to plant and water what has been planted now that the faith has spread so far and there are so many people... No matter who plants or waters, God gives no harvest unless what is planted is the faith of Peter and unless he agrees to his teachings.

It's funny, 'cause it seems like just yesterday that I was the youngest player just starting out. But now there are young players all over the league, and they'll ask me questions about playing overseas or finding an agent.

I want to have babies one day but not right now. When I do it I want to do it really well. I want it to be my best project in life.

I'm getting a wider circle of fans now. More women, more middle class people.

I am now convinced that theoretical physics is actually philosophy.

It is too maddening. I've got to fly off, right now, to some devilish navy yard, three hours in a seasick steamer, and after being heartily sick, I'll have to speak three times, and then I'll be sick coming home. Still, who would not be sick for England?

Although Alchemy has now fallen into contempt, and is even considered a thing of the past, the physicain should not be influenced by such judgements.

The kinds of shows that seem to work now, the comedy shows, are those which require very little attention. They're superficial and I like articulate comedy.

I'm a more mature actress now.

Before and during the first phase of the war his administration repeatedly maligned the UN but now, that Iraq has turned into a quagmire, it is asking the UN for help.

They haul you up there for, you know, week after week in this kind of star chamber proceeding. Then at the end of it they say, well, we found nothing, but now it's time for special counsel.

I have in hands, now, specimens of bottom from t he Gulf Stream, obtained by Lieutenant Craven, and I can say that they are among the most interesting that I have ever seen.

From now on it is only through a conscious choice and through a deliberate policy that humanity can survive.

So I am one of those bass players who can do something and musically, it was back then and now it is even more, if you noticed on the new album, I am not playing all the time anymore.

Had the Hebrews not been disturbed in their progress a thousand and more years ago, they would have solved all the great problems of civilization which are being solved now under all the difficulties imposed by the spirit of the Middle Ages.

I had to overcome the name Rock. If I'd been as hip then as I am now, I would have never consented to be named Rock.

I'm working harder than ever now, and I'm putting on my pants the same as I always have. I just get up every day and try to do a little better than the day before, and that is to run a great restaurant with great food, great wine, and great service. That's my philosophy.

The fact is, Latinos now own their own lives and I believe they can afford to look back without judgment.

Terrorism, ladies and gentlemen, in my eyes I have a very, very, very simple explanation. Gangs of criminals, killers, used unfortunately by certain governments in the past for political purposes, who are on their own now as gangs.

When I read a book I seem to read it with my eyes only, but now and then I come across a passage, perhaps only a phrase, which has a meaning for me, and it becomes part of me.