I've never told you the story of Alice in Wonderland, have I?

Hey kid, do you want to come and talk to Charlie?

After 13 years of life on the half shell in Hollywood, I have made a trip where I wasn't a tourist.

I was asking Charlie the most important questions, and you heard the answers.

I've never told you the story of Alice in Wonderland, have I?

But Charlie, Charlie, how can we ever really know anything? Charlie, what or who is God?

So many people are working in vaudeville today that I looked for three weeks to book enough acts for an hour bill and didn't have them until the night before we opened in Buffalo and money was no object!

Show me where Stalin is buried and I'll show you a Communist Plot.

Well, a friend in need is a friend indeed.

Nobody seems to know yet how television is going to affect the radio, movies, love, housekeeping or the church, but it has definitely revived vaudeville.

You find out your mistakes from an audience that pays admission.

OK, magic boy, let's see who you really are.

Hard work never killed anybody but why take a chance

I've got to be the geekiest guy in the world in a lot of ways. I'm like a zeta male.

It's unfortunate that sometimes in schools, there's this need to have things quantified and graded.

It always amuses me that the biggest praise for my work comes for the imagination while the truth is that theres not a single line in all my work that does not have a basis in reality. The problem is that Caribbean reality resembles the wildest imagination.

If I put my name on something, I'm going to be involved. I'm not just going to put my name on it and not pay attention.

This is kind of weird, but I eat lemons with salt as snack. They're so good!

The air is the only place free from prejudices.

I don't want to suggest that matrimony was necessarily a tragic affair - some of our neighbours' marriages seemed quite functional, if somewhat routine; nevertheless, in the workaday world, it is wedlock that is most likely to offer the occasion for life-threatening disappointment.

You see, party labels do not ensure unanimity any more than trying to cast the challenge we confront as a people through a partisan prism.

Tradition means giving votes to the most obscure of all classes, our ancestors. It is the democracy of the dead. Tradition refuses to submit to the small and arrogant oligarchy of those who merely happen to be walking about.

Sketching in general - anywhere, not just in Gitmo, but in life, in the world - is a profoundly disruptive act. Because you're creating something when you're kind of expected to consume or sit passively. I've always sketched things as a way to get into them, whether it was a fancy nightclub or, you know, to have kids think I was cool, whatever.

I think that when the world feels safe and secure, we probably feel more that way in our personal lives. What goes on in the world affects us, unequivocally.

I think the economic empowerment of women that has been growing over the past decade is at the 'inflection point' with this global recession. Women are, we believe, the solution for their families in their ability to go out and increase household income.

In Scotland, beautiful as it is, it was always raining. Even when it wasn't raining, it was about to rain, or had just rained. It's a very angry sky.

She became so important to them that they wondered how they had ever managed without her in the past. And the longer she stayed with them the more indispensable she became, so indispensable in fact that their one fear was that she might some day move on.

I had a fear of becoming anything, a fear of becoming a specialist. I might have become a doctor, but if you become a doctor, that's your specialty in life and you are defined by it. One of the attractions of being a writer is that you're never a specialist. Your field is entirely open; your field is the entire human condition.

People will send me tweets or texts, 'Yo, I'm at Red Lobster now and they're playing Mayer Hawthorne,' more of that kind of stuff, which is hilarious.

Sarah Palin is a symbol of everything that is wrong with the modern United States. As a representative of our political system, she's a new low in reptilian villainy, the ultimate cynical masterwork of puppeteers like Karl Rove.

The glories of our blood and state, Are shadows, not substantial things; There is no armour against fate, Death lays his icy hand on kings. Scepter and crown must tumble down, And, in the dust, be equal made With the poor crooked scythe and spade.

What most people need to learn in life is how to love people and use things instead of using people and loving things.

Why are you not smarter? It's only the rich who can't afford to be smart. They're compromised. They got locked years ago into privilege. They have to protect their belongings. No one is meaner than the rich. Trust me. But they have to follow the rules of their sh— civilized world.

I am surprised people took so long to pick up on the fact that my contract expires at the end of this year. Eddie has to decide who he wants to drive, so there is no secret anywhere. I am not concerned. It does not sit with my objectives to be competitive.

Long before the awakening of thought on earth, manifestations of cosmic energy must have been produced which have no parallel today.

I suffered when I was in my late twenties and early thirties. I was awkward, I stuck out, I was nerdy.

I've been going to 'Supernatural' conventions, so they tend to be big 'Lost' fans and big 'Supernatural' fans, but it's usually for both of those. Walking on the street, people are really, really into 'Lost.' But on the conventions circuit, it's Lucifer.