We had two rules growing up in my house: If you're going to take a shower, do it with whomever you're dating so you don't waste water; and if you buy one for yourself, buy six, because everybody's going to want one.

The idea of licking stamps seemed great fun for me.

I've got a new relationship and I'm trapped in this old life.

Gag me with a spoon!

I like to think of myself as a New Yorker, which is pathetic.

I would think: Stay close to the implants! They must know something because they keep getting asked backstage!

If there's anything more mortifying than being famous at 14, it's being washed up right after.

I made enough money to buy a house. That's crazy, but fame proved ephemeral.

I grew up with too much freedom. You can't define yourself.

I had a friend whose family had dinner together. The mother would tuck you in at night and make breakfast in the morning. They even had a spare bike for a friend. It just seemed so amazing to me.

Not many people know what their parents sound like having sex. It was noisy.

My mother tells this story that when I first went to school, I thought I was going to help the teachers. I didn't realise I was going to get educated.

I'm totally convinced I can write the perfect pop song.

My Dad was so open creatively that I was off in search of black turtleneck bathing suits with long sleeves.

I should just drive around this city and take photos of all the buildings I've been humiliated in.

Every job I've ever gotten has been an accident. All the jobs I actually go after, I don't get.

I didn't have any concept of age or authority. I remember realising, Oh, the world has rules and we don't.

My mother did literally hitchhike barefoot to the country store.

I spent most of my life locked in my bedroom, miserable about my raging acne.

It occurred to me, when I was old enough to make rules of my own, that they should be fair and simple.

How strange, when your father's wearing women's clothes and platform shoes, that a pair of loafers looks incredible.

We had two rules growing up in my house: If you're going to take a shower, do it with whomever you're dating so you don't waste water; and if you buy one for yourself, buy six, because everybody's going to want one.

I peaked early. I was told I'd missed my boat.

I think I have a dark view of the world. I have to make everything funny, otherwise it all seems so sad.

Your own experience keeps taking you towards something. My book adds the hope that it's a better something.

I don't want to lose my name because that's how I know myself. There is a legacy here.

I have a tree man coming to trim the jacaranda in my front garden.

Everyone has flaws. Its a matter of finding the ones you can live with.

Are you kidding? I'm a terrible cook, but John is a really great one. Literally, I never cook. The whole time we were dating, I prepared two officially romantic meals. Both of them were such disasters that he begs me never to go into the kitchen again.

I'm not cynical about marriage or romance. I enjoyed being married. And although being single was fun for a while, there was always the risk of dating someone who'd owned a lunch box with my picture on it.

I prefer ordinary girls - you know, college students, waitresses, that sort of thing. Most of the girls I go out with are just good friends. Just because I go out to the cinema with a girl, it doesn't mean we are dating.

Dodi got a lot of criticism when he began dating Princess Diana. No one seemed to think he was good enough for her.

No one knew me until I met my wife Lulu. Lulu's mother used to ask, Which one is Maurice? For six months she thought Lulu was dating Barry.

The Peking man was a thinking being, standing erect, dating to the beginning of the Ice Age.

I don't know the first real thing about the dating game. I don't know how to talk to a specific person and connect. I just think you have to go to person by person and do the best you can with people in general.

I was dating this guy and we would spend all day text messaging each other. And he thought that he could tell that he liked me more because he actually spelt the word 'YOU' and I just put the letter 'U'.

The learned are not agreed as to the time when the Gospel of John was written; some dating it as early as the year 68, others as late as the year 98; but it is generally conceded to have been written after all the others.

I tried to tell them about the dating process because I'm single now and how horrible it is and how many foolish experiences I had had dating. So I was really selling him hard, but the whole time he really wanted me!

I grew up in the world of bad television, on my dad's sets and then as a young schmuck on dating shows and so on.

I was dating a guy that was a huge wrestling fan and I'm embarrassed to say it now but I used to make fun of him for watching it.

You're talking to someone who has been married to various people for the last 40 years of her life. Dating is not really something familiar. I've never really been a dater.

I've been dating since I was fifteen. I'm exhausted. Where is he?

Dating is just awkward moments and one person wants more than the other. It's just that constant strangeness. I think it's a very real thing.

I don't understand the whole dating thing. I know right off the bat if I'm interested in someone, and I don't want them to waste their money on me and take me out to eat if I know I'm not interested in that person.

I started dating older men, and I would fall in love with them. I thought they could teach me about life.

It was funny actually because that was still during the time we were dating. He would get all these calls because supposedly before we broke up, we had already broken up in the trades, in the rags or whatever.

I want my audience to know me for my work, not because of who I'm dating or what drugs I'm on or what club I went to.

Nothing defines humans better than their willingness to do irrational things in the pursuit of phenomenally unlikely payoffs. This is the principle behind lotteries, dating, and religion.

I've been dating younger men since my 20s, When I was 29, I dated someone 21... younger men are just more fun. I like their energy. I've always been kind of young for my age.