The Good Humor man can only be pushed so far.

Remember, you can always find East by staring directly at the sun.

I am not authorized to fire substitute teachers.

Since September 11, security has been increased everywhere, and we have new IDs to get on to the Fox lot. I drove to the security gate, but realized I'd left my ID in my other car. I just broke into that voice - 'Hey, man, I'm Bart Simpson. Who else sounds like this?' The guard waved me through.

The fundamental laws of physics do not describe true facts about reality. Rendered as descriptions of facts, they are false; amended to be true, they lose their explanatory force.

I will not expose the ignorance of the faculty.

I will not get very far with this attitude.

The Pledge of Allegiance does not end with Hail Satan.

I don't use the voice of Bart when I'm making love to my husband, but Marge's voice turns him on a little.

The Good Humor man can only be pushed so far.

Cursive writing does not mean what I think it does.

I didn't do it, nobody saw me do it, there's no way you can prove anything!

Adding "just kidding" doesn't make it okay to insult the Principal.

Adding 'just kidding' doesn't make it okay to insult the Principal.

Grammar is not a time of waste.

Life is a paradox, you're damned if you do and damned if you don't

Men live by intervals of reason under the sovereignty of humor and passion.

Humor can help you cope with the unbearable so that you can stay on the bright side of things until the bright side actually comes along.

It is the ability to take a joke, not make one, that proves you have a sense of humor.

What we're doing is fun - if you have any sense of humor at all!

You've got to have a sense of humor to keep your sanity.

I don't think I could ever do a network sitcom because the humor is often based on some trite circumstance. I don't want to be a part of a show where it's mostly about coming up with the jokes.

All my jobs have been with food in one way or another since 1948. My parents were in the hotel business, and I just loved the warm hearted people who worked so hard with such good humor.

You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.

The man with the real sense of humor is the man who can put himself in the spectator's place and laugh at his own misfortune.

Advertisers also know that humor can help bond us to their product.

I am a great believer that what makes our show different is the humor.

The comic is the perception of the opposite; humor is the feeling of it.

Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.

Once we got over the origin story, we could really delve deeper into their lives and characters and angst. So this movie actually has more heart, more humor.

Incongruity, they say, is one of the main ingredients of humor. Maybe it's because everybody can feel superior to me. I honestly don't know.

I love Sell Out, I think it's great. I love the jingles. The whole thing as an album is a wonderful piece of work. The cover. Everything about it. It's got humor, great songs, irony.

In some sort of crude sense, which no vulgarity, no humor, no overstatement can quite extinguish, the physicists have known sin; and this is a knowledge which they cannot lose.

I'm not for gratuitous nudity, but if there's humor, I don't have a problem.

It felt as if things were literally slipping through my fingers. Things were just streaming away from me. I lost my sense of humor. I'm still looking for that.

Robert Walker as Bruno was excellent. He had elegance and humor, and the proper fondness for his mother.

I'm not really big on slapstick humor. I like gentle humor.

But it also became the experience, or was the experience, of the writers who were attracted to this kind of humor. They're all men or women who come from the same kind of experience in their own lives.

Puns are a form of humor with words.

No mind is thoroughly well organized that is deficient in a sense of humor.

Academics tend to have wonderfully infantile senses of humor.

A lot of my humor does come from anger. It's like, you're not gonna pull one over on me - which is pretty much my motto anyways.

While it is true that Frank had a great sense of humor, he was also very serious about composing music. In reality there are only a handful of skilled players who can play his most complex pieces. It takes a lot of patience to learn and requires a fantastic memory.

Gags die, humor doesn't.

A good actor is someone who knows how to take the part and make it real and make it honest and be effective in it. If it's in a funny movie and, as long as they are cast in an appropriate way, humor will come from it.

Our subconscious minds have no sense of humor, play no jokes and cannot tell the difference between reality and an imagined thought or image. What we continually think about eventually will manifest in our lives.

Keep your sense of humor, my friend; if you don't have a sense of humor it just isn't funny anymore.

Cathy was the first widely syndicated humor strip created by a woman. The strip was pretty revolutionary at the time not only because it starred a female, but also because it was so emotionally honest about all the conflicting feelings many women had in 1976.

Good taste and humor are a contradiction in terms, like a chaste whore.