The players are under so much duress, it's like duressic park out there!

Darts players are probably a lot fitter than most footballers in overall body strength.

Well as giraffes say, you don't get no leaves unless you stick your neck out.

Under that heart of stone beat muscles of pure flint.

He's as cool as a prized marrow!

The players are under so much duress, it's like duressic park out there!

He looks about as happy as a penguin in a microwave.

Look at the man go, its like trying to stop a water-buffalo with a pea-shooter.

The atmosphere is so tense, if Elvis walked in, with a portion of chips... you could hear the vinegar sizzle on them.

It's like trying to pin down a kangaroo on a trampoline.

There's only one word for that - magic darts!

When Alexander of Macedon was 33, he cried salt tears because there were no more worlds to conquer. Eric Bristow is only 27.

That's the greatest comeback since Lazarus.

There hasn't been this much excitement since the Romans fed the Christians to the Lions.

That was like throwing three pickled onions into a thimble!

He's about as predictable as a Wasp on speed.

As a kid, I was school swot, but I used to hang around the billiard halls, learning that Geordie sense of humour, mixing with low-lifes. They were the sort who'd pick your pocket and then say 'Here you are lad, here's tuppence, get yourself some chips'. I was a good rugby player, a good runner, so I fitted in at Cambridge quite easily.

At various points, I've had a massive chip on me shoulder. I had fights about me accent with loads of those fellers you get from third-class public schools. They used to think I was speaking German.

Golden rule of life: never underestimate your rivals.

I talk fast because I'm asthmatic, and I'm desperately hoping the words get out before my breath fails.

I want the little lassies who are thinking of going to a nightclub in Cardiff to stop to see what that guy's screaming for, or Grandma to put her knitting down to see why that guy's chatting about Alexander the Great. I'm after pulling in, whether it's in Manila, Beijing or whatever, the biggest possible audience.

I'm a postmodern commentator, and so, in a cheeky parallel to James Joyce or James Kelman, I get to places, verbally, that are a little unusual - when I talk about Jocky Wilson and end up sounding like a Jackson Pollock of the commentary box.

I'm never quite as excited as people think because with my voice, when I shout, I squeak.

I'm the world's worst after-dinner speaker. I need pictures to respond to. I was the voice of the lottery balls once and got the sack.

It's a form of mental and verbal gymnastics, and one of the things that appeals to me most about commenting on darts is that no one knows exactly what I'm going to come out with next - and neither do I.

The thing about darts is that you've got to shout. It's not like cricket where you can talk to Michael Atherton and ask him to analyse the bloody nuances. Darts does not have nuances. You've got to hurl yourself at it.

The thing with darts players is they have always appeared available. They don't have to live like monks. I've only ever met one dry player in 35 years.

You can get the dart player out of the pub, but you can't get the pub out of the dart player.

Well as giraffes say you dont get no leaves unless you stick your neck out.

Golden rule of life never underestimate your rivals.

I think if we were going to worry about teen pregnancy being glamorized, we should worry about shows like 'Teen Mom'. If people are going to want to have children at a young age because they see it on TV, I think that depends on the type of person you're dealing with.

I run around so much that I finally reasoned that composing is the one musical endeavour which you can do anywhere, anytime.

The fact that the person who you are sleeping with is also sleeping with another person or other people does not necessarily mean that he or she does not love you. And the fact that you are the only person who someone is sleeping with does not necessarily mean that he or she loves you.

I definitely look up to Veronica Roth, Suzanne Collins, and J.K. Rowling.

I've always just been attracted to comedy.

I don't believe in devils. Indifference and misunderstandings can create evil situations. Most of the time, people who appear to be evil are really victims of evil deeds.

Making money isnt the backbone of our guiding purpose it is the by product of our guiding purpose.

I'm not a robot.

Economics dominates politics and with that domination comes different forms of ruthlessness.

I cut 'Deer Hunter' myself.

There's one advantage in having been around as long as I have. Everybody in the Senate knows me, and - I'm going to say something presumptuous, to repeat myself - I think most respect me.

I was the most powerful left-handed hitter in the Alameda area.

It will be a physical encounter but we must not respond in kind.

The freedom of Cross Country is so primitive. Its woman vs. nature.

In an urban environment, a church building is a thing of the past.

I am not influenced by the techniques or fashions of any other motion picture company.

Winning doesn't always mean being first. Winning means you're doing better than you've ever done before.

I feel like all my faults go into making the person that I am. I like myself as a person. And I think taking any fault away would change who I am as a person.

I have two or three cars that I like, but today, Ferrari would be the best car I have driven in terms of being an impressive car.