My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother caught it and died of it.

I wish to thank my parents for making it all possible... and I wish to thank my children for making it necessary.

When an opera star sings her head off, she usually improves her appearance.

I don't mind going back to daylight saving time. With inflation, the hour will be the only thing I've saved all year.

If I have caused just one person to wipe away a tear of laughter, that's my reward.

The difference between a violin and a viola is that a viola burns longer.

My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother caught it and died of it.

He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.

Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth.

Laughter is the closest distance between two people.

Santa Claus has the right idea - visit people only once a year.

I only know two pieces; one is 'Clair de Lune' and the other one isn't.

Clarinets like lawyers have cases mouthpieces and they need a constant supply of hot air in order to function.

The oboe sounds like a clarinet with a cold.

I wish to thank my parents for making it all possible...and I wish to thank my children for making it necessary.

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year.

Santa Claus has the right idea – visit people only once a year.

There are two things that I put my focus on. One is the fight against AIDS and finding a cure. The other is human rights.

The United States cannot feed every person, lift every person out of poverty, cure every disease, or stop every conflict. But our power and status have conferred upon us a tremendous responsibility to humanity.

There must be quite a few things that a hot bath won't cure, but I don't know many of them.

There is no miracle cure for the many problems of the world.

There are two reasons for drinking: one is, when you are thirsty, to cure it; the other, when you are not thirsty, to prevent it.

The surest cure for vanity is loneliness.

We may have found a cure for most evils; but we have found no remedy for the worst of them all, the apathy of human beings.

But the cure for most obstacles is, Be decisive.

The only cure for contempt is counter-contempt.

And there are lots of drug companies that are working on cure or medicine.

If I found a cure for a huge disease, while I was hobbling up onstage to accept the Nobel Prize they'd be playing the theme song from 'Three's Company'.

Hush! Check those words. Do not cure ill with ill and make your pain still heavier than it is.

The sovereign cure for worry is prayer.

There is no cure for emphysema, but you can start treating it and have a better quality of life.

I'm not going to worry about the Cure slipping down into the second division; it doesn't bother me because I never expected to be in the first division anyway.

The disease is painless; it's the cure that hurts.

Premature burial works just fine as a cure for adolescence.

Sameness is the mother of disgust, variety the cure.

Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.

There is only one cure for the evils which newly acquired freedom produces, and that cure is freedom.

I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge. That myth is more potent than history. That dreams are more powerful than facts. That hope always triumphs over experience. That laughter is the only cure for grief. And I believe that love is stronger than death.

The cure for crime is not the electric chair, but the high chair.

Research is what it's going to take to cure all these diseases.

Just because there is a problem doesn't mean that we have to solve it, if the cure is going to be more expensive than the original ailment.

Capital punishment is as fundamentally wrong as a cure for crime as charity is wrong as a cure for poverty.

Somebody told me I should put a pebble in my mouth to cure my stuttering. Well, I tried it, and during a scene I swallowed the pebble. That was the end of that.

The cure for anything is salt water: sweat, tears or the sea.

There can be no greater error than to expect, or calculate, upon real favors from nation to nation. It is an illusion which experience must cure, which a just pride ought to discard.

Music is amazing. There's some metaphysical comfort where it allows you to be isolated and alone while telling you that you are not alone... truly, the only cure for sadness is to share it with someone else.

I do a lot of races for the cure for breast cancer.

The Arthritis Prevention, Control and Cure Act of 2005 is bipartisan legislation directing funding and promoting education and research toward the goal of preventing, treating and curing arthritis.

A severe though not unfriendly critic of our institutions said that the cure for admiring the House of Lords was to go and look at it.