Just say the lines and don't trip over the furniture.

It's discouraging to think how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.

I love criticism just so long as it's unqualified praise.

I've sometimes thought of marrying - and then I've thought again.

Someday I suspect, when Jesus has definitely got me for a sunbeam, my works may be adequately assessed.

My body has certainly wandered a good deal, but I have an uneasy suspicion that my mind has not wandered enough.

Work is much more fun than fun.

We have no reliable guarantee that the afterlife will be any less exasperating than this one, have we?

Mona Lisa looks as if she has just been sick, or is about to be.

There's always something fishy about the French.

Never mind, dear, we're all made the same, though some more than others.

The higher the building the lower the morals.

Let's drink to the spirit of gallantry and courage that made a strange Heaven out of unbelievable Hell, and let's drink to the hope that one day this country of ours, which we love so much, will find dignity and greatness and peace again.

I have always paid income tax. I object only when it reaches a stage when I am threatened with having nothing left for my old age - which is due to start next Tuesday or Wednesday.

People are wrong when they say opera is not what it used to be. It is what it used to be. That is what's wrong with it.

Extraordinary how potent cheap music is.

If you must have motivation, think of your paycheck on Friday.

Wit ought to be a glorious treat like caviar; never spread it about like marmalade.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I have a memory like an elephant. In fact, elephants often consult me.

I'm not a heavy drinker, I can sometimes go for hours without touching a drop.

Just say the lines and don't trip over the furniture.

That strange feeling we had in the war. Have you found anything in your lives since to equal it in strength? A sort of splendid carelessness it was, holding us together.

It is discouraging how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.

Success took me to her bosom like a maternal boa constrictor.

Squash - that's not exercise, it's flagellation.

I'll go through life either first class or third, but never in second.

I don't believe in astrology. The only stars I can blame for my failures are those that walk about the stage.

I don't believe in astrology. The only stars I can blame for my failures are those that walk about the stage.

Passion in a dromedary doesnt go so deep a camel when its mating never sobs itself to sleep.

Its discouraging to think how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.

I have a memory like an elephant. In fact elephants often consult me.

If you must have motivation think of your paycheck on Friday.

For gin in cruel sober truth supplies the fuel for flaming youth.

A perfect martini should be made by filling a glass with gin then waving it in the general direction of Italy.

Trust your instincts. If you have no instincts, trust your impulses.

People reach an age... where somebody else's platform is no longer yours.

Id rather be a rider for a minute than a spectator for a lifetime.

Well, the stuff that has become more commercial doesn't have any edge.

What is meat for one is not for another--no accounting for fancy.

A new type of superstition has got hold of people's minds, the worship of the state.

The lives of the best of us are spent in choosing between evils.

As our enemies have found we can reason like men so now let us show them we can fight like men also.

By the time of the '90s boom, CEOs had become superheroes, accorded celebrity treatment and followed with a kind of slavish scrutiny that Alfred P. Sloan could never have imagined.

The only safe thing is to take a chance.

I guess I just always imagined that I was going to die, like, somehow on top. I was going to, like, go out in some sort of blaze of glory. I never thought about sort of fading into obscurity. And I've worked so hard at having a life, an identity, in obscurity and finding peace with that.

Horses and horsepower alike are about status and being cool.

Sometimes you don't know what you've got until you put it in front of an audience - and the enthusiasm for the show from the audience has been just incredible.

One of the few certainties in life is that persons of certainty should certainly be avoided.