We have no reliable guarantee that the afterlife will be any less exasperating than this one, have we?

It's discouraging to think how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.

I love criticism just so long as it's unqualified praise.

I've sometimes thought of marrying - and then I've thought again.

Someday I suspect, when Jesus has definitely got me for a sunbeam, my works may be adequately assessed.

My body has certainly wandered a good deal, but I have an uneasy suspicion that my mind has not wandered enough.

Work is much more fun than fun.

We have no reliable guarantee that the afterlife will be any less exasperating than this one, have we?

Mona Lisa looks as if she has just been sick, or is about to be.

There's always something fishy about the French.

Never mind, dear, we're all made the same, though some more than others.

The higher the building the lower the morals.

Let's drink to the spirit of gallantry and courage that made a strange Heaven out of unbelievable Hell, and let's drink to the hope that one day this country of ours, which we love so much, will find dignity and greatness and peace again.

I have always paid income tax. I object only when it reaches a stage when I am threatened with having nothing left for my old age - which is due to start next Tuesday or Wednesday.

People are wrong when they say opera is not what it used to be. It is what it used to be. That is what's wrong with it.

Extraordinary how potent cheap music is.

If you must have motivation, think of your paycheck on Friday.

Wit ought to be a glorious treat like caviar; never spread it about like marmalade.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I have a memory like an elephant. In fact, elephants often consult me.

I'm not a heavy drinker, I can sometimes go for hours without touching a drop.

Just say the lines and don't trip over the furniture.

That strange feeling we had in the war. Have you found anything in your lives since to equal it in strength? A sort of splendid carelessness it was, holding us together.

It is discouraging how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.

Success took me to her bosom like a maternal boa constrictor.

Squash - that's not exercise, it's flagellation.

I'll go through life either first class or third, but never in second.

I don't believe in astrology. The only stars I can blame for my failures are those that walk about the stage.

I don't believe in astrology. The only stars I can blame for my failures are those that walk about the stage.

Passion in a dromedary doesnt go so deep a camel when its mating never sobs itself to sleep.

Its discouraging to think how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.

I have a memory like an elephant. In fact elephants often consult me.

If you must have motivation think of your paycheck on Friday.

For gin in cruel sober truth supplies the fuel for flaming youth.

A perfect martini should be made by filling a glass with gin then waving it in the general direction of Italy.

Trust your instincts. If you have no instincts, trust your impulses.

I don't believe in an afterlife, so I don't have to spend my whole life fearing hell, or fearing heaven even more. For whatever the tortures of hell, I think the boredom of heaven would be even worse.

Do for this life as if you live forever, do for the afterlife as if you die tomorrow.

We have no reliable guarantee that the afterlife will be any less exasperating than this one, have we?

When videotape came so a lot of movies that I do have a kind of afterlife in video. Things where movies that I do would come and go; they still come and go but you can go rent them and see them on TV.

I had to get rid of any idea of hell or any idea of the afterlife. That's what held me, kept me down. So now I just have nothing but contempt for the institution of the church.

Men long for an afterlife in which there apparently is nothing to do but delight in heaven's wonders.

I learned early about the misery and dangers of life, and about the afterlife, about the external punishment which awaited the children of sin in Hell.

He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife.

I find it difficult to imagine an afterlife, such as Christians, or at any rate many religious people, conceive it, believing that the conversations with relatives and friends interrupted here on earth will be continued in the hereafter.

And a friend of mine in the Christys, we used to sit up at night and talk and read and wonder if reincarnation, and if it wasn't reality, what would happen to the human spirit when the body dies? Is there an afterlife? Just questions like that.

Why do people embrace God? In my opinion, belief in God and an afterlife is a necessary extension of man's need to feel that this life does not end with what we call death.

Likewise the leader of any state has to do the same, he has to enforce Shariah firmly, for he will be held in account later in the afterlife if he fails.

I happen to believe that there is an afterlife.