I have no detectable hair style.

It's so crazy in Hollywood.

To be famous and broke is hard.

It's just a campy blast. I just want to do as little as I can and make it good, and try not to sell out. I'm sure I will, but I'm just trying to postpone it.

I'm like a Dilbert cartoon.

When I started I'd fly across the country to do a gig for a hundred bucks.

To make money I picked up work as a busboy, valet parker, skateboard shop employee.

There are too many fawning entertainment shows out there and not one of them is making fun of it all.

In grade school I was smart, but I didn't have any friends. In high school, I quit being smart and started having friends.

You can either look at things in a brutal, truthful way that's depressing, or you can screw around and have fun.

I want to get back to my fighting weight of 98 pounds. I have the exact measurements of that guy from the movie, Powder. Right now, I am the reigning West Coast Powder.

I have no detectable hair style.

Success? You can't get a big head about it. When people stare at me, they could be whispering to their friend, 'That guy sucks! Have you seen him before? He's horrible.'

My career is just kind of crazy.

It's funny because it's funny.

I have no stories to sell. A lot of my relationships are with civilians, and no one wants to hear about those.

I got into stand-up to get on a sitcom.

I never dated much in high school or college.

I never have kids in movies or in TV shows.

I've had it where things didn't go well for me with movies or something that got canceled.

It's hard to have a career.

Most of the shows I want to do I'm not smart enough to figure out how to watch.

No one wants to know I set my alarm and get up 8, but I think it's too weird to sleep in too late.

Single guys get a bad rap.

Sometimes when I watch a TV season, your favorite shows die quickly. And then sometimes it's not your favorite, and they live on for 12 years.

There's always something funny about men chasing women.

You know, you want to pull in a wide audience.

Theres always something funny about men chasing women.

I recorded my hair this morning, tonight I'm watching the highlights.

Hair is also a problem. I remember once, when I was reporting from Beirut at the height of the civil war, someone wrote in to the BBC complaining about my appearance.

I hated Chris, my brother. I would pull his hair and kick him, until one day my father gave him permission to fight back. I'll be apologizing to him for the rest of my life.

I really don't like when things are all polished and perfect - the perfect love story and the hair is perfect.

I dyed my hair blonde in that movie, so my head doesn't match my grill.

I like to sing in the car with the windows rolled down and hair blowing all over my face.

When I was 12, every little girl in Russia was trying to wear her hair like mine and playing tennis.

I have the biggest hair in the world - and that's official!

You know, I do not think it is necessarily looks, I do not think I am the prettiest girl... Everyone has something that is their asset, some have the hair, some have the cheekbones, others have the lips. But once you know what is your asset, then you should capitalize on it.

If you look over the years, the styles have changed - the clothes, the hair, the production, the approach to the songs. The icing to the cake has changed flavors. But if you really look at the cake itself, it's really the same.

Surely the fact that a uniformed police officer is wearing his hair below his collar will make him no less identifiable as a policeman.

I was going to buy a book on hair loss, but the pages kept falling out.

Martin Jarvis was to have played the part originally but I think I had longer hair or something, I know not.

It was just using the liquid shampoo - the Russians have one very similar to the stuff we use on the Shuttle - you just wet your hair with it and then wipe it out.

I've been burn when it comes to my hair that it ain't no joke.

I really fought to make my character not a stereotype. I play a soap star with dyed blonde hair.

I'm the artist formally known as Beck. I have a genius wig. When I put that wig on, then the true genius emerges. I don't have enough hair to be a genius. I think you have to have hair going everywhere.

I grew up in Dallas, with cowboys. I was the only guy in sixth grade with long hair and an earring. Let's just say I got a lot of, er, flak for being different.

My singing is part of me, like my stoutness, or my light hair, or my poor eyesight.

Benji usually tries to match his hair with his underwear, and you know how he had the pink hair for a while well we caught him in a pink thong one day!

Yes, exercise is the catalyst. That's what makes everything happen: your digestion, your elimination, your sex life, your skin, hair, everything about you depends on circulation. And how do you increase circulation?