When the grandmothers of today hear the word "Chippendales," they don't necessary think of chairs.

One of the most difficult things to contend with in a hospital is that assumption on the part of the staff that because you have lost your gall bladder you have also lost your mind.

I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being skin deep. That's deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas?

Man is the only animal that learns by being hypocritical. He pretends to be polite and then, eventually, he becomes polite.

I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on.

Some people have such a talent for making the best of a bad situation that they go around creating bad situations so they can make the best of them.

I think success has no rules, but you can learn a great deal from failure.

Hope is the feeling that the feeling you have isn't permanent.

You don't seem to realize that a poor person who is unhappy is in a better position than a rich person who is unhappy. Because the poor person has hope. He thinks money would help.

Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speak by something outside himself like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks.

Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house.

Now the thing about having a baby - and I can't be the first person to have noticed this - is that thereafter you have it.

Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze?

I make mistakes; I'll be the second to admit it.

If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, it's just possible you haven't grasped the situation.

A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.

The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old.

Even though a number of people have tried, no one has ever found a way to drink for a living.

The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible.

When the grandmothers of today hear the word "Chippendales," they don't necessary think of chairs.

A man speaks only when driven to speech by something outside himself - like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks.

Being divorced is like being hit by a Mack truck. If you live through it, you start looking very carefully to the right and to the left.

When the grandmothers of today hear the word 'Chippendales', they don't necessary think of chairs.

I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me they are wonderful things for other people to go on.

Im tired of all this nonsense about beauty being only skin deep. Thats deep enough. What do you want and adorable pancreas

Im tired of all this nonsense about beauty being skin deep. Thats deep enough. What do you want an adorable pancreas

Being divorced is like being hit by a Mack truck. If you live through it you start looking very carefully to the right and to the left.

A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.

Marrying a man is like buying something youve been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home but it doesnt always go with everything else in the house.

When the grandmothers of today hear the word Chippendales they dont necessarily think of chairs.

Now the thing about having a baby and I cant be the first person to have noticed this is that thereafter you have it.

Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze

Socialism proposes no adequate substitute for the motive of enlightened selfishness that today is at the basis of all human labor and effort, enterprise and new activity.

I am tomorrow, or some future day, what I establish today. I am today what I established yesterday or some previous day.

If I had to come up with something that just came to me, I think growing up in a small town, I want knowledge. I still think today, knowledge is one of the keys.

There's more than a few remnants left in German welfare policy today. Many Germans eagerly condemn Hitler's fascism but won't examine the other reasons why the Third Reich succeeded for a season.

Compared to today's salaries, our cut was minuscule but it was very good for the time.

The NFL today has bigger, stronger, bodies than ever, moving faster than ever, hitting a stationary object harder than ever before - so the physics of the hit have changed.

The President of today is just the postage stamp of tomorrow.

I'm so happy because today I found my friends - they're in my head.

I don't know where the stock market is going, but I will say this, that if it continues higher, this will do more to stimulate the economy than anything we've been talking about today or anything anybody else was talking about.

I'm not up on today's television for children, because it's mostly cartoons that don't seem to interest me.

We aim in the domain of politics at republicanism; in the domain of economics at socialism; in the domain of what is today called religion, at atheism.

Today's interpretations of religion are often backward and contradict the needs of civilization.

The most profound, tangible influence in my life has been my wife, Monique. I don't know that I would even be alive were it not for her, and I certainly would not be the person that I am today.

Were you to read the British press today, you would learn that the British Empire never forgets its defeats.

As patients and consumers, we are better informed today about our health care than any previous generation.

A couple of guys won Academy Awards for the things that I turned down. Today, after coming to terms with everything, after being in therapy for a long time-there are areas where I will compromise.

I know the history of the record business so well because I followed Billie Holiday into the record studios. It was so primitive compared to the sophisticated business today.