Yvan Dorier

1. They’re pleasers. Persuasive people never win the battle only to lose the war. They know how and when to stand their ground, and yet they are constantly making sacrifices that help their cause. They know it’s better to be successful than it is to be “right".

2. They aren’t pushy. Persuasive people establish their ideas assertively and confidently, without being aggressive or pushy. Pushy people are a huge turn off. The in-your-face approach starts the recipient backpedaling, and before long, they’re running for the hills. Don’t be impatient and overly persistent.

3. They aren’t mousy, either. On the other hand, presenting your ideas as questions or as though they need approval makes them seem flawed and unconvincing. If you tend to be shy, focus on presenting your ideas as statements and interesting facts for the other party to mull over.

4. They know their audience. Persuasive people know their audience inside and out, and they use this knowledge to speak their audience’s language. Everyone is different, and catching on to these subtleties goes a long way toward getting them to hear your point of view.

5. They paint a picture. Research shows that people are far more likely to be persuaded by something that has visuals that bring it to life. Persuasive people capitalize on this by using powerful visual imagery. Good stories create images in the mind of the recipients that are easy to relate to and hard to forget.

6. They use positive body language.

7. They smile. People naturally (and unconsciously) mirror the body language of the person they’re talking to. If you want people to like you and believe in you, smile at them during a conversation, and they will unconsciously return the favor and feel good as a result.

8. They acknowledge your point of view. An extremely powerful tactic of persuasion is to concede the point. Admit that your argument is not perfect. You want your audience to know that you have their best interests at heart. “I see where you are coming from,” “That makes a lot of sense"

9. They ask good questions. The biggest mistake : failing to hear what’s being said because they are focusing on what they’re going to say next or how what the other person is saying is going to affect them. A simple way to avoid this is to ask a lot of questions. People like to know you’re listening

10. They use your name. Your name is an essential part of your identity, and it feels terrific when people use it. Persuasive people make certain they use others’ names every time they see them.

11. They form connections. Without instruction of any kind, 55% of the students successfully reached agreement. However, when students were instructed to introduce themselves and share their background before attempting to reach agreement, 90% of the students did so successfully.

12. They are genuine. People gravitate toward those who are genuine because they know they can trust them. Persuasive people know who they are. They are confident enough to be comfortable in their own skin.

13. They are patient When you try to force people to agree instantly, studies show that they are actually more likely to stand by their original opinion. If your position is strong, you shouldn’t be afraid to back off and give it time to sink in. Good ideas are often difficult to process instantly.